Happy, he's- well, he's one of my employees. And a good friend. I put him in charge of keeping an eye on Parker - you know, the kid with the spider costume? Turns out Parker likes to leave him these long, rambling voicemails about all the things he's doing in Queens. Helping little old ladies cross the street, returning stolen bikes, stuff like that. Happy won't stop complaining about it.
[He's not sure how he feels about it, either. But at least the kid's sticking to small-time stuff, nothing too major. Not that Tony thinks that luck will last for long.]
What? [Tony looks horrified for a moment because he's leaping to what he really hopes is the wrong conclusion. (Look, the guy's an ex-assassin.)]
I mean, if you happen to leave the building, which I'm telling you not to do [and they both know he'll sneak out] you could keep an eye on the kid. Make sure he doesn't get in over his head. Just...without letting him know about it.
Not like there's a whole lot of trouble in Queens, but- [Something like that.]
Although, for legal purposes, let me state that I'm in no way suggesting that you should do anything that might jeopardize your, uh, already precarious legal standing. [In other words: don't get caught. Although, really, Tony's pretty sure that Bucky could outsmart the entire NYPD with one hand tied behind his back.]
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He listens to Stark explain, then shifts in his own seat again. Sorry, Tony, that nickname is just the worst. ]
...wait, who? What voicemails?
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[He's not sure how he feels about it, either. But at least the kid's sticking to small-time stuff, nothing too major. Not that Tony thinks that luck will last for long.]
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[ But-- oh. The Spider-kid. Bucky remembers. You have a metal arm? That's awesome!
Bucky had been too surprised by the kid's strength at the time, too surprised by the fact a kid was fighting him. ]
So, you want me to make him stop calling?
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I mean, if you happen to leave the building, which I'm telling you not to do [and they both know he'll sneak out] you could keep an eye on the kid. Make sure he doesn't get in over his head. Just...without letting him know about it.
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[ Just so he's clear.
And he would only think about sneaking out. Maybe. Probably.
Ahem. ]
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Although, for legal purposes, let me state that I'm in no way suggesting that you should do anything that might jeopardize your, uh, already precarious legal standing. [In other words: don't get caught. Although, really, Tony's pretty sure that Bucky could outsmart the entire NYPD with one hand tied behind his back.]
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I won't. Just tell me what I need to be doing right now.